I don't know about you, but I like my kids best when they are playing quietly like adorable little mimes. Wishful thinking, I know. But there's something to be said for choosing children's toys strategically and eliminating loud, flashing toys with high-pitched singing voices whenever you get the chance.
Give your toddler the gift that keeps on giving — one of these quiet toys that won't drive everyone in your family up the wall.
1. An adorable children's book
The quietest reader gets a prize. (Amazon, $7)
2. A broken iPod
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Hours of unplugged fun for everyone.
3. A cotton ball
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I defy anyone to make noise with a wisp of cotton.
4. A DIY portable LEGO kit
Image: funathomewithkids.com
Please do not ever board a plane without this — for the sake of all other passengers.
5. A Doodle-Pro
A less jerky alternative to an iPad at a restaurant. (Amazon, $20)
6. Fabric
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Fabric doesn't seem very fun to the innocent observer, but remember, it's all about imagination.
7. A feather
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A single feather, because two would be too loud.
8. A few blank faces
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Creepy at first glance, until you realize that it buys you hours of quiet drawing time.
9. Finger puppets
Parents swear that these babies are church-approved. (Amazon, $20)
10. Green Toys™ Train
Surprisingly un-clangy because it's made from 100 percent recycled plastic milk jugs. (GreenToys, $30)
11. A hole puncher
Pairs perfectly with a very quiet piece of paper. (Amazon, $2)
12. Kiddie digital camera
Not gonna lie that I actually want one of these for myself. (Amazon, $51)
13. A muzzle
Only kidding, of course. (Or am I...?) (Amazon, $8)
14. A nativity felt board
Another quiet activity inspired by quiet, quiet church. Thank you, Jesus. (Amazon, $7)
15. A one thousand piece puzzle
You will probably never solve this incredibly complicated adult puzzle, but have fun trying. (Amazon, $14)
16. Paper dolls
Paper dolls are still cool in an incredibly hipster kind of way. And still really quiet. (Amazon, $12)
17. Pipe cleaners and buttons
So quiet yet so complex once kids are past choking age. (Amazon, $8)
18. Sticker book
Stickers are the official antidote to the toddler tantrum. Everybody knows that. (Amazon, $5)
19. The Baby Faces book
Looking into other kids' faces is surprisingly mesmerizing. (Amazon, $5)
20. The quiet book
The name says it all. (Amazon, $8)
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